Pesto & Paediatrics

We went to dinner with some friends on Saturday, one of whom – a new addition to our crowd – is a paediatric nurse at a high-profile hospital. We were breaking our news, so whilst me and my Significantly Better Half (she might be reading) were both conscious of not boring everybody senseless with too much “pregnancy” talk, much of the night”s conversation was always inevitably going to head in that direction. So it was great to be able to get some feedback and advice from an experienced professional.

Except it wasn’t. 

You see, what we actually got from our friend’s new girlfriend was a personal account of some of the headfuckingly terrifying things she’s witnessed go wrong. We’re not totally naive about these things, and there was too much said on the night to go into here, but as a little precis:

• There was the “feelgood” tale about the recently-born baby who’s scull had been fractured by what might allegedly have been some overly enthusiastic delivering*.
• There were the cautionary warnings about the health risks associated with a high percentage of IVF babies (our baby isn’t IVF, but still… upsetting).
• Oh and this little nugget: “which hospital are you going to? Oh, *there*.Well I mean they have do a pretty bad reputation. But! That’s where you should go, as it’s the best in the area”.

Yeah, cheers for that!

To be be fair, in the context of the whole evening, this was only about ten minutes worth of the discussion, and so not as depressing as it comes across on the page when extracted for emphasis. I don’t think it was her intention to upset or worry; just seems to me that being a part of that world means you have to be at least a bit hardened and clinical, and possibly a little less sensitive than a wuss like me was expecting. Anyway it worked as a cracking diversionary tactic to stop us indulging in too much baby talk. And some of it’ll no doubt come in handy as a nice little bit of conversational artillery for the next time my mum or sisters want to bend my ear about the whole thing.

*’Delivering’ being my verb of choice for now, but please bear with me – I’m sure to master all the precise medical lingo in time.

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